November 3rd, 2022
by Brian Cropp
by Brian Cropp
The Mistake
An unrealistic, romantic view of marriage
- The "Long Jump" view
- Short-sighted, believing romantic love is all you need.
- Crossing your fingers, hoping that the feelings of romance will last and sustain the relationship.
- Believing things will always stay the same.
- Assuming your personalities are static.
- Not adjusting to life stages and changing circumstances.
The Effects
Tremendous disappointment and eventual disillusionment
- When reality sets in, you may wonder if this marriage was such a good idea
- Mistakenly believe that you have to keep feeling the same romantic feelings as when you first "fell in love," and doing things to get those feelings back
- Since romance isn't enough, you fail to do those things that are really required to make the marriage what it ought to be
- Eventually, you become disheartened about the relationship
What to Do
Strive to have a marriage that is based on a mutual commitment that grows over time.
- A foundation of mutual commitment to God, marriage, your marriage, and each other.
- "marathon View": Strengthen the foundation by being far-sighted, beginning with the end in mind, and successfully negotiating the stages that your marriage will go through.
- build upon the foundation and fortify the walls by.
- Doing the right things.
- Practicing the "One Anothers" (Prescriptions in the Bible for how to treat each other rightly.
- Build healthy boundaries around your marriage for its protection.
Posted in Marriage
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